Thursday, July 7, 2011

Thursday July 7th
So it’s 7:24 am and I’m sitting here watching "Always Be My Baby" on Youtube. There are no words to express the feeling I get watching this video. It always reminds me of 6th grade at Lakeview Middle and a camp we went to. I was soooo in love with Matt Knight! He was just so cute and sooo sweet to me. Of course we were "just friends" even though I wanted to be his girlfriend sooo bad! This video is just so special to me. The video actually takes place at a camp and the kids look like they are about the age I was when we were at the camp. I think I watched this video like 30 times before we left for camp and I had it in my head that Matt and I were going to basically play out the video. I had this whole fantasy worked out in my head. We were both going to sneak out of our cabins and he was going to kiss me. I have always lived in a fantasy world and I fully believe that anything is possible, so Matt actually deciding to kiss me was a possibility in my mind. Well the last day of camp I was so down because my fantasy hadn’t happened. One of my girlfriends (who was also friends with Matt) decided to go tell Matt about my whole fantasy and how I was now sad because it didn’t happen. I wasn’t aware that she had told him anything. Well as soon as we were all in bed and the lights were out she tells me to go outside. I was like "why"? She said "Just do it". I snuck outside and standing on the porch was Matt. He said "So I hear you’ve been watching too many music videos" Haha. I was speechless. I seriously didn’t know what to say. The next thing I know he leaned in and gave me a kiss on the lips! It was so sweet and innocent, but it was one of the most memorable moments in my life. He was never interested in me as anything other than a friend, but he was always so kind to me. He was never mean or hurtful when I would say things about how much I liked him and wanted to be his girlfriend. He would always say "you are my best friend and I want to keep you in my life and I never want to hurt you". There were so many other times in 6th grade that he took up for me, or just did or said something to make me smile. There are those people in your life who leave such a big impression and never know. I have tried to find him on Facebook and Myspace and haven’t had any luck. He was such an amazing person to me. *You never know what your actions may mean to another person, so always try to be kind and caring*